“Hands across the water, heads across the sky”……
That image from the 1971 song by Paul McCartney still resonates when we think of the human need to connect.
At our recent Elders Take Action, “Panel on Connection”, dietitian Brenna Jefferson used her ten minute “time slot” very effectively.
She told a story – about an elderly woman who needed nutrition support. Brenna visited and had her info at the ready to address the need for vitamins, minerals, etcetera. But after a few minutes she realised that the elderly woman KNEW all of this. But she was not doing well; she was eating alone.
Brenna solicited the help of the elderly woman’s daughter and a weekly dinner at “Gramma’s” was started. The older woman started baking again. She looked forward to seeing her grandchildren each week and spending special dinner time with her family. And her health improved. Connection when eating – a recipe for success.
The “eating together “recommendation is particularly appropriate if you have a friend or family member in hospital. Visit at a mealtime, take your own lunch or snack, and encourage the patient to try some of their dinner. Often, they might not even try to eat if they are alone. Make sure that if you take food in, it is something they are allowed to eat.
But Brenna’s story was engaging and remembered also because it is a “story”. And a story is another and very significant way that we, as humans, connect.
Several years ago at L’Arche Comox Valley, a project involved “telling one’s stories” by creating a book of photos and memories. This was an important process for “core members” (adults with developmental disabilities) and they would often show you their personal book at the beginning of a visit (‘This is my story, this is my history, this is who I am’). We all need to tell our stories, but we also need to listen to the stories of others.
An excellent recent article by Rose Girard in the Comox Valley Collective (Youth Valley section) highlights this need. Rose writes, “Stories trigger oxytocin in our brain. … the act of sharing or absorbing a narrative feeds our desire for empathetic connection.”
And so, a hug of thanks to Brenna, for the memorable story and the important information about connecting over a meal, and, also to Rose, who shows that the next generation is keeping the torch burning on the importance of connection through stories.
So, share a meal with an older isolated friend or relative. Talk to an older person, tell your story AND listen to theirs.
Article by Jennifer Pass, co-ordinator of Comox Valley Elders Take Action:
Email: cvelderstakeaction@shaw.ca Website: https://cvelderstakeaction.info
Leave a Reply